Cascade Model of Relational Dissolution: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 19:29, 17 April 2024

Revision as of 19:37, 3 October 2024

Line 16:

=== Horseman One: criticism ===

[[Criticism]] is the first indication of the Cascade Model and is an attack on the partner's character.<ref name=":12" /><ref name=":3">{{Cite web|url=https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/|title=The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling|date=2013-04-24|website=The Gottman Institute|language=en-US|access-date=2019-02-07}}</ref> Gottman defines criticism as a type of complaint that blames or attacks a partner's personality or character.<ref name=":5" /> Critical comments often materialize in chained comments and are communicated in broad, absolute statements like "‘you never’" or "you always.".’<ref name=":5" /> Research indicates that non-regulated couples, or couples whose interaction trended more negative, engaged more frequently in criticism and were more likely to begin the Cascade of Dissolution.<ref name=":2" /> Gottman's and Levenson's research found that wives' criticism correlated to separation and possible dissolution, but this was not so with husbands.<ref name=":12" />

One possible solution to avoiding criticism is to grow the culture in a marriage to include a well-held vulnerability. This means that those in the marriage should feel safe enough to express their opinions and frustrations without fear of rejection. Criticism does not allow partners to be vulnerable with each other, and their relationship can quickly deteriorate as a result. One may consider using more "I" statements and expressive language in order to overcome criticism. An example of an "I" statement is: "When I am feeling frustrated, I tend to become more irritable and begin to hyper-focus on your flaws to blame someone for my negative feelings"." "I" statements allow a spouse to take responsibility for their feelings rather than blaming the other spouse for their perspective and emotional reactions. They build emotional intelligence, self-reflection, and help prevent cycles of criticism and defensiveness.<ref>{{cite web | url=https://www.gottman.com/blog/types-of-criticism-expressing-concern-or-complaint-without-harm/ | title=Types of Criticism: Expressing Concern or Complaint without Harm | date=3 March 2022 }}</ref>

=== Horseman Two: defensiveness ===