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The examples are all taken from featured article candidates. We've removed reference numbers to prevent clutter. Links appear only in the initial text of each exercise, because subsequently we use specific colour coding that would be cluttered by the blue colouring of links.
===Exercise 1: Somerset===
This is taken from the lead of [[Somerset]].▼
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===Exercise 2: Jane Zhang===
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===Exercise 3: SR Merchant Navy Class===
▲This is taken from the lead of [[Somerset]].
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<font color=black>THE PROBLEM TEXT
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<font color=black>Incorporating a number of new developments in British steam locomotive technology, the ''Packets'' were amongst the first British designs to utilise welding in the construction process, which meant that components could be more easily constructed during the wartime austerity and post war economy.
[There are four issues.]
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<font color=black>''WHAT'' THE ISSUES ARE
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*Two unnecessary repetitions.
*A missing hyphen.
*An ugly word that has a coomon, shorter equivalent.
*An old-fashioned word.
*Opportunities for neater expression in two places (position underlined in "Where the issues are").
*An opportunity to split an over-long sentence (position underlined in "Where the issues are").
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<font color=black>''WHERE'' THE ISSUES ARE
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<font color=black>Incorporating a number of new developments in <font color=purple>'''British'''<font color=black> steam locomotive technology, the ''Packets'' were <font color=teal>'''amongst'''<font color=black> the first <font color=purple>'''British'''<font color=black> designs to <font color=chocolate>'''utilise'''<font color=black> welding in the <font color=purple>'''construction'''<font color=black> process<u>, which meant that components could be more easily <font color=purple>'''constructed'''<font color=black> during the wartime austerity and <font color=darkgreen>'''post war'''<font color=black> economy</u>.
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<font color=black>THE SOLUTION
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</b><font color=black>Incorporating a number of new developments in British steam locomotive technology, the ''Packets'' were <font color=teal>'''<s>amongst</s> among'''<font color=black> the first <font color=purple>'''<s>British</s>'''<font color=black> designs to <font color=chocolate>'''<s>utilise</s> use'''<font color=black> welding in the construction process<s>, which meant that components could be more easily constructed<s><u>; this enabled the easier <font color=purple>'''fabrication'''<font color=black> of components<font color=black> during the <s>wartime austerity and post war economy</s> <u>austerity of the war and <font color=darkgreen>'''post-war'''<font color=black> economies</u><font color=black>.
'''Notes'''
*<font color=red>'''The problem of logic and of vagueness: "Once"'''<font color=black> suggests that the orchards were plentiful at some time in the past and are no longer so; but the subsequent clause implies that plentiful orchards have ever since been and still are plentiful, since the county is known for its apple cider. An indication is required of when "in the past" this was, even if as vague as <font color=red>'''"for at least five centuries"'''<font color=black>. We have guessed a solution; the author would need to be asked to check this.
*<font color=darkgreen>'''The wrong lexical item: "Linked to"'''<font color=black> is ambiguous; <font color=darkgreen>'''"known for"'''<font color=black> is presumably what the author intended.
*<font color=purple>'''The false comparison:''' <font color=black>The unemployment rate in Somerset is being compared with the unemployment rate in the surrounding counties, not with the counties themselves; <font color=purple>'''"that of"'''<font color=black> can be inserted to stand for "the unemployment rate of" those other counties; then the comparison is valid.<font color=black>
*<font color=chocolate>'''The MOS breach:'''<font color=black> Slashes are '''[[Wikipedia:Manual_of_Style#Slashes|usually avoided]]'''.
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Incorporating a number of new developments in British steam locomotive technology, the ''Packets'' were amongst the first British designs to utilise welding in the construction process, which meant that components could be more easily constructed during the wartime austerity and post-war economy.
The locomotives also featured Bulleid's innovative, though controversial [[Bulleid chain-driven valve gear|chain-driven valve gear]] and the inclusion of [[thermic syphons]]. The class members were named after the Merchant Navy shipping lines involved in the [[Battle of the Atlantic]], and latterly those which used [[Southampton Docks]], an astute publicity masterstroke by the Southern Railway, who operated Southampton Docks during the period.
Due to problems with some of the more novel features of Bulleid's design, all members of the class were subsequently rebuilt by [[British Railways]] during the late 1950s, losing their air-smoothed casings in the process. The ''Packets'' operated until the end of Southern steam in July 1967. One third of the class avoided being scrapped, and they can be seen on [[heritage railway]]s throughout Great Britain.
Incorporating a number of new developments in British steam locomotive technology, the design of the ''Packets'' was among the first to use welding in the construction process; this enabled easier fabication of components during the austerity of the war and post-war economies. The locomotives featured [[thermic syphons]] and Bulleid's controversial, innovative [[Bulleid chain-driven valve gear|chain-driven valve gear]]. The class members were named after the Merchant Navy shipping lines involved in the [[Battle of the Atlantic]], and latterly those which used [[Southampton Docks]], an astute publicity masterstroke by the Southern Railway, which operated Southampton Docks during the period.
Due to problems with some of the more novel features of Bulleid's design, all members of the class were rebuilt by [[British Railways]] during the late 1950s, losing their air-smoothed casings in the process. The ''Packets'' operated until the end of Southern steam in July 1967. A third of the class have survived and can be seen on [[heritage railway]]s throughout Great Britain-->
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