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Bob1960evens (talk | contribs) →History: typo |
Bob1960evens (talk | contribs) →Lawsuits: text reviewed |
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*''Assembly Bill 1889''. Suggest "Assembly Bill No. 1889", which is its official title, so there is no confusion that 1889 might be a year, which I assumed at first.
;Contracts awarded
Back soon. [[User:Bob1960evens|Bob1960evens]] ([[User talk:Bob1960evens|talk]]) 16:52, 4 September 2017 (UTC)▼
*''CBOSS kicked off physical work...'' "kicked off" is too colloquial, and it was Parsons who began the physical work, not CBOSS. Suggest rewording.
*''The FRA approved Caltrain's plans...'' This is the first time FRA has been mentioned in the body of the article, so should be "Federal Railroad Administration (FRA)". (It is also too far from the lead to remember what FRA stands for.)
*''The PCEP draft environmental impact report (EIR)...'' This paragraph has drifted into jargon, with too many acronyms to make it readable. This is the first mention of PCEP, so it should be introduced as "Peninsula Corridor Electrification Project (PCEP)" I would suggest that EIR is one acronym too far, and so suggest "After the environment impact report was revised to address the comments received, PCJPB certified this final draft in January 2015." or similar.
*''Stadler was awarded a $551 million contract to deliver 16 "KISS" trains of 6 bilevel electric multiple units each...'' This needs expanding just a little, for clarity. Suggest "The Swiss firm Stadler was awarded a $551 million contract to deliver 96 of their bilevel KISS cars, formed into 16 six-car electric multiple units..." or similar.
;Construction
*This is a single sentence section. Could it be expanded a little, given that there are three refs supporting it?
===Design===
*''PCJPB authorized eminent ___domain proceedings...'' "eminent ___domain" is not a term that I recognise, and should be wikilinked to the article of that name.
;FRA waiver and CBOSS PTC
*''meeting FRA PTC standards in 49 CFR 236...'' This is jargon. Suggest expanding to "meeting FRA positive train control standards as defined in Title 49 of the Code of Federal Regulations, part 236" or similar, with a wikilink to "Title 49 of the Code of Federal Regulations."
;Service changes
*''The weekend schedule was revised effective July 15 2017, which increased headways (and decrease service frequency) from 60 minutes to 90 minutes between trains and eliminated eight trains per weekend day.'' The bracketed phrase is in the wrong tense, and the wrong place. Suggest "The weekend schedule was revised on July 15 2017, with headways increased from 60 minutes to 90 minutes between trains, and service interval decreased, by eliminating eight trains per weekend day." or similar.
;Rolling stock
*''will be compliant with FRA alternative Tier-I crash-worthiness standard, in which it will have...'' This sentence is too long, and has some issues. Suggest splitting and slight revision. So "will be compliant with the FRA alternative Tier-I crash-worthiness standard. It will have..." or similar. "the FRA ... standard" could be "FRA ... standards" if that is more appropriate.
*''Caltrain KISS trains will be allowed to operate in mix traffic with heavier trains...'' Suggest "mixed traffic".
*''the EMU train will be equipped with doors at two heights...'' Should be "the EMU trains..."
*''for ADA-compliant unassisted boarding of all passengers.'' ADA is another acronym, and needs expanding.
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