Stonecutters Club

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The Ancient Society of Stonecutters is a fictional secret society from the animated television show The Simpsons conceived as a parody of Freemasonry in particular and secret societies in general. Founded on extreme secrecy, its members include various Springfield residents--such as Montgomery Burns and Carl Carlson--who enjoy special privileges, such as free soda and vibrating chairs. Meeting every Wednesday at a giant pyramid-shaped building, they pay homage to their Sacred Parchment, then get drunk and play ping-pong. The Stonecutters are numbered according to rank, their leader being Number One (voiced by Patrick Stewart).

After joining the Stonecutters, Homer Simpson used the Sacred Parchment as a napkin, destroying it. After being stripped of his Stonecutter robes, it was discovered that Homer had a birthmark identifying him as "The Chosen One", who was destined to lead the Stonecutters to greatness. Homer's reign would ultimately lead the Stonecutters to break away and form a new society, "The Ancient Society of No-Homers", headquartered in an abandoned Baskin-Robbins ice cream parlor. As one might expect, Homer was not allowed to join.