Hikikomori (Japanese: ひきこもり or 引き篭り) are adolescents and young adults that feel overwhelmed by the Japanese society, feel unable to fulfill their expected social roles, and react with social withdrawal. Hikikomori often refuse to leave their parent's house, and may lock themselves in a single room for months or even years. According to some estimates there may be 1 million hikikomori in Japan, or one out of 10 young men. Most of them are male, and many of them are the eldest son.
Causes of withdrawal
There is a lot of pressure on the adolescent and young adults in Japan by the Japanese society to be successful. The pressure comes from a number of different sources.
One of the biggest concerns for Japanese adolescents is their performance in the education system, where they often face significant pressure from parents and the society in general. In extreme cases the pressure starts already before pre-school, where they have to pass an entrance exam to get into the best pre-school, which prepares the children for the entrance exam of the best kindergarten, which in turn prepares the child for the entrance exam of the best primary school, junior high school, high school, and eventually for the entrance exam of the university. Many adolescents take 1 year off after high school to study exclusively for the exam hell of the university entrance exam. The higher the prestige of the university, the more difficult the exam, the most prestigious university with the most difficult exam being the University of Tokyo.
After graduating from high school or university, they also have to face a very difficult job market in Japan, often finding only part time employment and ending up as freeters with little income, unable to start a family.
Another source of pressure is from their co-students, which may harass and bully some students for a variety of reasons, as for example physical appearance, especially if they are overweight, educational and athletic performance, wealth, ethnicity, and many others.
Withdrawal symptoms
While many people feel the pressure of the outside world, and may feel uncomfortable in public, a hikikomori reacts with a complete social withdrawal to avoid all the outside pressure. They, usually male, may lock themselves into their bedroom or another room of their parent's house for prolonged periods of time, often measured in years. They usually do not have any friends, mostly sleeping all day long and watching TV or playing computer games throughout the night. This makes them an extreme case of parasite singles.
The withdrawal from society usually starts gradually before the hikikomori locks the door of his room. Often they appear unhappy, lose their friends, become insecure, shy, and talk less. Frequently they are bullied at school, which may be the final trigger for the withdrawal.
Reaction of the parents
Having a hikikomori in the family is usually considered an internal private matter of the family, and many parents wait for a long time before seeking psychological counsel. Also, in Japan the education of the children is traditionally done by the mother, and the father may leave the problem of a hikikomori to the mother, who feels very protective to her child. Initially, most parents simply wait and hope that the child will eventually overcome his problems and return to society by his own will. They see it as a phase the child has to overcome. Also, many parents are uncertain about what to do with a hikikomori, and wait simply due to lack of other options. An aggressive approach by the parents forcing the child back into society is usually not taken or only after a considerable waiting period.
Having a hikikomori in the family is often embarrassing to the family and considered a private internal matter of the family in Japan. The schools and social workers may make inquiries, but usually do not get involved into the situation.
Effects on the hikikomori
The lack of social contact and the prolonged isolation has a profound effect on the mentality of the hikikomori, and they lose their social skills and the necessary social references and moralities. Often, they have difficulties to distinguish between right and wrong, and the world of the TV or computer games becomes their frame of reference.
If the hikikomori finally - often after a few years - re-emerges voluntarily, he has to face the problem of having lost much of his social skills and a number of years in his education. This makes the reentry into society more difficult. They fear that others will discover their hikikomori past, and they also feel uncertain with people, especially strangers.
Their fear of the social pressure also may turn into anger, and the loss of the social frame of reference may also lead to violent or criminal behavior. Some hikikomori attack their parents. A number of crimes have been committed by hikikomori. In 2000, a 17 year old hikikomori hijacked a bus and killed one passenger. Another extreme case kidnapped a young girl and held her captive for nine years. Yet another one killed 4 girls to reenact scenes of his hentai manga. Exact numbers about the hikikomori and their violent behavior is difficult to obtain as most families do not talk about these problems.
Treatment
There are different opinions about the treatment of a hikikomori, and the opinions often split into a Japanese and a western point of view. Japanese experts usually suggest to wait till the hikikomori reemerges, whereas western doctors suggest to drag the hikikomori back into society, by force if necessary. In any case psychological help is needed as many parents are overwhelmed with the problems of a hikikomori. While there are some doctors and clinics specialized on helping hikikomori, many hikikomori and their parents still feel a lack of support for their problems.
Worldwide
The total social withdrawal seems to be mainly a Japanese phenomenon, but youths all over the world feel the social pressure and may be bullied, often creating a similar behavior of hate and aggression, as for example the extreme cases of the Columbine High School massacre in Littleton, Colorado, United States, or the Erfurt massacre in Erfurt, Germany.